Saying 'Uncle'

• "Yes, Mom, I'm trying really hard to be calm, nice and friendly around my Uncle Braden - remember, we agreed it would be my little 'service project' and our little 'secret.' "
• "He thinks that by holding me this far away that I won't be able to spit up on him. But I didn't earn the nickname of 'The Spewmaster' for nothing."
• "Who's your favorite nephew?"
• "It can be so embarrassing to be seen out in public with a 15-year-old uncle. I mean, if your uncle can't drive a car and take you cruisin' around town, over to the mall or out for pizza or In-N-Out burgers, what good is he anyway?"
• "So, this is how the whole 'pit' thing started — not impressed." (from Mitch)
• "Didn't anyone teach you how to hold me? Duh . . . this isn't a stake dance — you can hold me a little closer." (from Mitch)